That's How They Roll

Republicans sure are a funny bunch. They'll ignore you, ostracize you, vilify you, put you down, and diss you.

But just one Republican Senator goes Democratic, and all of a sudden, they're buying you ice cream:

Oh hey there, remember last year when, during the election, John McCain’s pathetic campaign resorted to offensive yet hilarious attacks against those of us who live in Northern Virginia? Remember how they called us communist and “fake Virginia.” Yes!? Well guess what!! Now the tool bags are coming here to hold the first in a series of events where they will feverishly try to figure out why they suck and what they can do to fix it.

Congratulations, Northern Virginny! You're fashionable now!

You want Republicans to start celebrating Teh Gay?

As soon as Teh Gay becomes instrumental in getting Republicans elected, male-on-male pegging (warning: That link goes to an unexpectedly adult Wikipedia article) will become a sacrament. You can bank on that.

My salute to those in "fake Virginia". Work those bastiches for all you can, then kick them to the curb so you can watch them cry.

They earned it.

Limbaugh Pwned By Republican LIstener Who's Had A Gutful

If you haven't heard this one yet, you need to. It's the story of a man forced to look in the mirror and recoiling at what he saw.

You know him as Rush Limbaugh. Add your own epithets.

Thank God, incidentally, for Media Matters for America. They need no introduction around the liberal noosphere, of course, but I mention them because they are heroes to me, if only because someone over there listens to Limbaugh so we don't have to.

That is one crappy job. Must be just below Assistant Crack Whore on the crappy jobs scale. But it's a public service to be sure.

Anyway, I just heard this on Malloy, But all the stuff is over at the Media Matters site, including a recording. The caller is someone named Charlie, who identifies himself as someone who votes conservative and didn't want to see Obama elected and who served in the Marines and the Army, and all of a sudden, apparently, he had a gutful of it all, and it centers on that thing we don't do, torture:

Thanks, Rush. Rush, listen, I voted Republican, and I didn't -- really didn't want to see Obama get in office. But, you know, Rush, you're one reason to blame for this
election, for the Republicans losing.

First of all, you kept harping about voting for Hillary. The second big issue is the
-- was the torture issue. I'm a veteran. We're not supposed to be torturing these people. This is not Nazi Germany, Red China, or North Korea. There's other ways of interrogating people, and you kept harping about it -- "It's OK," or "It's not really torture." And it was just more than waterboarding. Some of these prisoners were killed under torture.

And it just -- it was crazy for you to keep going on and on like Levin and Hannity and Hewitt. It's
like you're all brainwashed.

And my last comment is, no matter what Obama does, you will still criticize him because I believe you're brainwashed. You're just -- and I hate to say it -- but I think you're a brainwashed Nazi. Anyone who could believe in torture just  has got to be - there's got to be something wrong with them.

Yes, that's right. You just heard a Republican call Rush Limbaugh a brainwashed Nazi. It took several minutes for Rush to get back on his pins but he was never able to regain the initiative, so he ended the call and lept off the deep end into the river of de Nile:

Charles, Barack Obama is president of the United States today because of stupid, ignorant people who think like you do. You pose -- you and your ignorance are the most expensive commodity this country has. You think you know everything. You don't know diddly-squat.

You call me a Nazi? You call me somebody who supports torture and you want credibility on this program? You know, you're just plain embarrassing and ludicrous. But it doesn't surprise me that you're the kind of Republican that our last candidate attracted. Because you're no Republican at all based on what the hell you've said here.

When confronted with the truth of what he's done, Rush Limbaugh recoils in horror at it ... and projects it on the messenger. The mistake here would be to assume that Mr. Limbaugh holds only liberals or people who don't agree with him in contempt. He holds all his listeners in contempt. If he didn't he would hand out such intellectual offal.

Of course I didn't excerpt it all ... that'd just be rude of me. Go to Media Matters to read the whole thing and listen to the clip.

It's historic, in a way. There may well be no better exposition of the corruption that is Rush Limbaugh and exactly what he does when confronted with it. It deserves a listen. It deserves two listens.

Simple Answers To Simple Questions on: Wingnuts Fomenting Open Rebellion

Kari at BlueOregon:

Will the responsible Oregon Republicans denounce these dark demons that stoke the fires of revolution?

No.

This has been another edition of Simple Answers To Simple Questions.

We would answer the question Is There Such A Thing As A Repsonsible Oregon Republican, but we do not run a series called Oregon Political Koans. Maybe someone else will. I"m just not that smart.

On Public Assistance In TN? Forget About Winning The Lottery.

In our latest example of the pure hatred and disdain the Republicans have for the poor, comes this amazing concept from the state of Tennessee. According to reports we've heard over the weekend, Tennessee State Rep. Stacey Campfield (R-But What Did You Expect) wants to harsh one of the few buzzes poor folks get:

"This bill prohibits issuance of lottery prizes in the amount of $600 or more to any person who receives state or federal economic or medical assistance due to indigency."

Arrie Chamberlain says the measure is unfair. She plays the lottery every week, is on the government's food stamps program and has a job.

"If I work and go out and earn a living, why can't I spend the money? Everybody else gets to. Just because I make less money and have more obligations doesn't mean the state can tell me how to spend my money. "

If there's anything that makes my blood boil, I mean really boil, it's the way we expect The Poor to be more virtuous than us, and if we don't, well, we despise them. The Poor aren't Poor because they're evil, they're poor because, unlike you (the editorial You, please note, not the personal You) their chances didn't work out. And we aren't necessarily any better than them, just a bit luckier.

Now, I don't condone addiction or frittering away, but I also don't begrudge poor people the occaisional drink or lottery ticket. If my tax money is supporting someone having just a little fun, so be it. The mass of poor people who dissipate themselves themselves through drink and fun is a myth, just like the Cadillac-driving "welfare queen" that the Reagan cosmology gave us.

(for the record, I drink sparingly, and never play the Lottery.)

Think about it. Just because you're poor doesn't mean you don't want to just kick back, enjoy, and dampen the pain for a little while.

And that's not all, of course. Rep Campfield's idea of social engineering is to tell poor people who are taking any public assistance, even if they earn most of thier own money and just can't make ends meet, that they can't win the lottery.

Poor? Tough. Suck it. Win the lottery? Screw you.

The only thing Stacey Campfield deserves for this is the big middle finger.

Mannix: You Know Their Tired Of You When They Won't Even Laugh At Your Jokes Anymore

So it seems that Kevin "Not The 1970s TV Detective" Mannix knows how to see in April – with a rather high-quality joke:



Because Oregon doesn't have an LG, you see. In case you aren't in on the joke.

Read here at the WW Kev's press release. I don't appreciate Republicans (and Kevvy less than most) but I do appreciate a healthy sense of humor, and this was a good one.

But boy, do his Republican cohort wish he'd just enjoy retirement. One editorial in the Oregon Catalyst and the disdain just happens. It ain't pretty. You can read it at this URL:

http://nwrepublican.blogspot.com/2009/03/kevin-mannix-is-back.html

which I'm going to make you cut and paste because I'm not going to sully my beautiful blog with links to a place like that.

Kevin, you are now an outcast in your own party.

Didn't think that would happen, did you?

That's the way your party rolls, though. Anyone on the outside could have told you that.

But anyone on the outside is an enemy, amirite?

But seriously, I thought it was a good one.

But everyone knows that, out of respect, John Lim was going to get to be LG first.

You Can't Go To Europe Either? Damn.

(via) I can't afford to take a vacation any farther away from here than Salem. I'm certainly not going to Europe in the forseeable future.

So I'm totally feeling the Bush Admin Republicans who won't be going to Europe anytime soon. Seriously. Of course, I can't go because there's no money, honey. They can't go because it just wouldn't be a good idea, in the staying-out-of-international-jail way.

Just so you guise know, if you need ideas about how to take time off in America, I can help you there. Staycation? We just call that life around here.

And, no, it's not because I'm bitter that all the fomerly-prosperous people I see are breaking their arms patting themselves on the back in self-congratulation on discovering the joys of the "Staycation" when that's pretty much all the vacation I've ever known.

Okay, I lied just there. It is, in fact, because I am amazingly bitter about it. [Sam Kinison Primal Scream] Welcome to MY WORLD!!!! [/Sam Kinison Primal Scream]

Republicans On Pretty Much Everything: "We Must Have Tax Cuts"

It's been beat pretty much to death on The POJ, but it was said of the news today that State Senator Brian Boquist (R-Reading From A List Of Talking Points) of Polk County said Republicans had great ideas on how to get Oregon's economy turning over again.

So, I thought "hey! Any idea that The POJ has the guts to announce as being from teh Republicans has got to be a game-changer!"

Well, you can all go home again. Clear out the auditorium:

Tax cuts. Withholding tax cuts. Tax credits for remodeling your home (should go over like a shot with renters and people who have low incomes). Tax cuts, tax cuts, tax cuts.

Let's set the scene: let's say that, due to a revolution in science, it was found that, instead of four billion years in the future, the Sun was going to enter its red-giant phase, scouring all the Earth of live, in only four years. You can picture the headlines now:

REPUBLICANS ON SUN GOING NOVA; WE MUST HAVE MORE TAX CUTS

They're all like big, fleshy Teddy Ruxipins that only have one tape. It's the answer to everything.

To save everyone a step from here on out, please review the following comic I stumbled on today. It should explain everything about the Republican response to the economy, AIDS, poverty, scoliosis, tooth decay ...

(Image hotlinked from the Big Fat Whale site:
click here to embiggen)

Mother Nature Hates Governor Teleprompter

March 22nd, 2009, 10:30 pm; Mount Redoubt in Alaska erupts.

(This was actually a photo of the 1990 eruption)

February 25th, 2009: Bobby "Teleprompter" Jindal, Governor of Louisana, criticizes necessary spending in the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act, saying:

It includes $300 million
to buy new cars for the government, $8 billion for high-speed rail
projects, such as a “magnetic levitation” line from Las Vegas to
Disneyland, and $140 million for something called “volcano monitoring.”

Wikipedia, on Mount Redoubt:

The 1989 eruption is also notable for being the first ever volcanic eruption to be successfully predicted by the method of long-period seismic events developed by Swiss/American volcanologist Bernard Chouet.

Ah ... so that is what it's good for, that rascally volcano monitoring.

Quod erat demonstrandum, baby.

The Norm Coleman Full Employment Plan

Are the RNC about to trade Michael Steele in for Norm "I Want Every Vote Counted Unless it's Going To Be For Franken" Coleman?

Poltiico (and others) seem to think so.

Republicans either failing upward or sideways. And the more I think about it, the more I realize that Norm Coleman is the perfect face of the odd bird the Republican party has become.

You go, boy.

(via MNPublius, and h/t to Kevin at Preemptive Karma for jogging my memory on this one).

Will Michael (Not The Ex-Bangle) Steele Soon Be Ousted?

Tegan Goddard seems to think it possible:

Republican insiders tell Political Wire that a no confidence vote on RNC Chairman Michael Steele is likely to be called after the NY-20 special election on March 31 -- regardless of whether Republicans win the seat or not.

Later in the article it's related that the putative putsch leader, someone I've never heard of named Katon Dawson, reiterate that he supports Steele.

So Steele's going to be kicked to the curb soon. Unless he isn't, of course. But it seems to me that the point isn't that the RNC may have the mother-of-voters-remorse over Mr. Steele, but that the whispers are going out at all.

But it stands to reason. Republicans pay lip-service to the marketplace of ideas, but in the Big Tent, it's lockstep all the way, and Michael Steele has these little things called independent thoughts that make the old white guys who run the place swoon.

Remember how I said this some time ago:

Tiernan said he was attracted to Steele by his dynanism and ability to articulate Republican values. He said Steele's ethnicity helps bust the stereotype that the GOP is a "party of old white guys who only care about business."

There's a big, big difference between busting the stereotype and actually changing the way one thinks.

The former is message, the latter is substance, and with Republicans, the message is substance.

Translation: they are still the party of old white guys who care about business.

They're more addicted to message than a tweaker is to their crystal.

That's your political lesson for the day.

Bad News/Good News: The Faces Of The Oregon Republican Party

Welcome to Bad News/Good News, our occasional feature where we start with the silver lining only to be distracted by the dark cloud within. This edition:

The Oregon Republican Party

Yeah, those guys. Now, we have sympathy. We, as liberals, know what it's like to have everyone hating you for no good reason (although in your case, we think there are at least eight years of Good Reasons).

Anyway, very recently, RNC Chair Michael "I wasn't the bassist for the Bangles (sorry, Rush)" Steele visited Portland for no discernible reason (but it made the kulturkampfers feel good maybe). And who spoke at the gathering but Oregon's two Rushiest radio talkers: Lars "Actually Lives in Vancouver" Larson and Victoria "Hanging On For Dear Life at KPAM" Taft, as Carla "The Unimpeachable" Axtman reported over at BlueO.

Not the most promising speaker ticket. But let's look at Both Sides Now:

The Bad News: The most vocal advocates conservative Oregon Republicans have are Lars Larson and Victoria Taft.

The Good News: at least they don't dress like this:

Because just what the world doesn't need is more revealing clothes on Lars Larson.

(Image above hotlinked from TPM's CPAC coverage).

That's been another edition of Bad News/Good News.

They Only Wound Up Galting Themselves Over

Hey, Conservative Blogosphere, How's that "Going Galt" Working out for you?

Apparently, not so well according Hilzroy @ the Washington Monthly:

None of the people Dr. Helen interviews is actually Going Galt. More to the point, neither is Dr. Helen. She claims to be "mulling over ways that she can "go Galt". Allow me to help her
out (along with Michelle Malkin, Glenn Reynolds, et al.) To Go Galt, she should:

(a) Identify those things that she does that are genuinely creative and productive. If there aren't any, then the fact that it will be difficult for her to Go Galt is the least of her problems. 

(b) Refuse to do those things in any way that allows society at large, as opposed to a small circle of like-minded individualists, to benefit from them.

It really is that simple. If she and the other bloggers who are calling on people to "Go Galt" don't do this, the only explanations are that they don't have the guts to do what they are encouraging others to do, or that they recognize that nothing they do counts as creative or
productive, or that they just aren't thinking about what they write.

Read the whole thing (seriously, it's important) and read the comments too. They're some of the most thoughtful comments I've ever seen to a post.

They use that word a lot, the conservative bloggers. But we're pretty sure it does not mean what they think it means.

Oh, Go Galt Yourself

Just caught whiff of this. Us Orygonian bumpkins and bumpkinettes may not have heard of this, but this sounds like the silliest, selfishest, most self-indugingest thing since the other week when that risible "teabagging" party trend (link rated R for adult situation) that happened because Santelli belched something resembling a thought (It would be helpful to note that CNBC's Rick Santellin not only Hates You (tm) but is a buffoon as well, though unlike Jim Cramer, he's not even funny).

It's called going Galt.

As someone once said, assume I'm an Objectivist, and assume I'm a dunce ... but I repeat myself. Now, we all know (even if we don't Rand around) that John Galt is the pivotal character in Atlas Shrugged. He is the ubermensch upon whom withdrawing the creative contribution causes the entire Earth to spin into the sun (or cause another Thin Man movie to be made, or something like that). If you buy into Objectivism, the "men of ability" (not you) are the people who actually make the world go round, and if they decide to stop contributing, then the whole fabric of society unravels and the whole place starts to look like sections of Detroit we've heard about recently.

Now that the rabble (if you're reading this and you wonder who the rabble might be, it's you, Sparky) have begun to actually demand that government work for them instead of on them, the Masters of the Universe (if you wonder if you are one, then it's a dead sure thing you aren't) have decided that they're just going to take their ball and go home.

Balloon Juice has a pretty good summary here:

Much html code has been spilled about the wingnut obsession with “going Galt” in order to avoid paying a 39% marginal rate on income over 250K a year. Matt Yglesias points out that we’d probably be better off if a lot of wealthy Americans went Galt, the Washington Independent has a nice run-down of the whole movement (oh, it resembles a certain sort of movement, if you follow me–ed), if it can be called that, and commenters all over point out that John Galt would never have worked as a dentist, represented people from Bakersfield, or slept with Glenn Reynolds.

Take that lese majeste, you little people. Once you all pipe down, we're getting you a shorter chain.

Problem is, those self-styled Galters don't really resemble John Galt much at all. Once again, if you buy into such Random philosophy and you think that the world won't go unless a creative elite does anything, most of the those who want to go Galting around don't really produce anything that society can't do with out. Conservative bloggers? Investment managers? Commentators? Michelle freaking Malkin?

We'll, they'll show us, you see. They'll go off to the gulch and hope we all Galt ourselves off a cliff.

I hope their little feelings won't get too hurt when they find out the world kind of works better without them.

I kind of hope they Galt off along with the horse they rode in on. We'll all be better off.

Mom always said there'd be people like that there, too, also.

I Wondered Why A "D" Would Sponsor That Bike Registration Bill

... with three Republicans. Loaded Orygun explains:

I honestly am not sure whether Rep. Schaufler just does this kind of thing to be a dick, but if I asked you for one Democrat in the House who might be expected to sign onto something like this, it's Schaufler or nobody. This is the guy who threatened Merkley with a nay vote on any Measure 37 bill that didn't get a GOP vote, no matter what the bill said.

Oh. He's a jerk.

Thanks for the expl, LO.

Brain-Free Republican Lawmakers

It's what you get when you govern by talking points.

I'm Sorry, Rush.

I don't know what for, I just am. I abjectly apologize.

I mean, a whole lot of people are apologizing to El Limbaugh for no obvious reason, and I'm sure, as a liberal, I've done something to offend.

So, there ya go. I'm covered.

Palin/Jindal in 2012! USA! USA! USA!

Red State Trike Force

No, it's not a spelling error:

See what the Red State Trike Force is doing to recruit more support and paradoxically winding up with less at Drinking Liberally New Milford (yes, it's a stumble) here.

As they said at that blog:

Damned if they do, damned if they don't... And just too damned funny to not watch!

Overparsing Them Is What They Want You To Do

In listening to Thom Hartmann today, I once again remembered something I tell everyone who will listen.

The central thing to being a Republican mover and shaker (that is, the Inner Party as opposed to the Outer Party, if you'll put up with the Nineteeen Eighty-Four reference) is that they love to use language not to communicate, not to bridge the gulf between you and then, but as a very soft weapon.

Every word is a loaded gun, just waiting to have the trigger pulled to cause confusion, misinformation, or damage.

Let's take a very simple, very over-used word. Conservative. It's what they call themselves, from the former boy-wonder Dubya down to the garden level chump who's endless credulity moves them to vote for a Party that's all about screwing them.

Conservative. What does that mean? We know what it means. It means careful, prudent, preserving of everything possible.

So the Conservatives ascend to power, and they start ruining the place, doing everything except conserving, being careful, staying the course on what works. But they keep saying they're Conservative, while all the while they're being the exact opposite ... radical, reactionary. And then sane people start scratching their heads.

"But they say they're Conservative," your bemused self says. And you start to re-analyze what conservative means. And you begin to hold two definitions in your head. There's big-C Conservative, which is what the Republicans are, and little-c conservative, what the thing really is.

You may not know it, but they have you. They hit you upside the head with the C-word and, even if you're pretty smart and hard-to-fool, you have to dance according to new rules. There's now neo-conservatives and paleo-conservatives and this-sort-of-conservative and that-sort-of-conservative and pretty soon you have to qualify everything you talk about so much that it's just not worth the hassle of even discussing anymore.

And now they own the discussion, they own the frame. They have you. You're still sane, you're still a good person, but you can't have a discussion without laying out ground rules. Because you've analyzed a common word, conservative, until it's just a greasy spot on the ground.

We call ourselves liberal and conservative, but what we really mean are sane and insane, respectively speaking of course.

I don't know the answer, really I don't. But some of it must have to do with refusing to play that game, calling stupid stupid and insane insane (and since the Republicans have worked so hard to redefine public debate as a snake pit, it's okay that you do that ... or they'll start calling you you were supposed to be the polite ones and you'll start overparsing that too).

But however it happens, remember, it has to happen little by little and bit by bit.

Because that's how we lost the reasonable expectation to have a reasonable debate and not to have a public arena where winning is the only thing.

We can take it back to them. If they live by Frank Luntz, they'll die by Frank Luntz. But it will take diligence.

You can start by reminding them it's the Democratic Party, not the Democrat Party ... and challenge them to talk not using words from a list of talking points.

Joe-The-Plumber: Not The Draw CPAC Hoped, Maybe (11 Showed Up, 5 Books Sold-Update)

Garrett Quinn, attending the misama that is CPAC, via Wonkette:

Joe-the-Plumber spoke to 1/4 full room. It was pathetic. I got video of how f**king empty the room was. I tried to make an echo off the walls but I got yelled at. Video to come.

One of the draws of this unholy confab was, of course, Mr Potemkin Village himself, Samuel "Joe the "Not Really A" Plumber" Wurzelbackhoe. I heard an offhand comment by Thom Hartmann on his morning show that only a handful of people attended his 'talk' and even fewer (less than ten) walked off with a book signed by him.

Oh, and you know what ol' "Joe the Plumhead" said about members of Congress that didn't support the Iraq war?

He said they should be shot.

"Joe the Plumhead" has boundless contempt for you. He's just too dumb to know that's what it is.

Now, America, I'm going to tell you one. more. time: Don't. Ever. Let. These. People. Near. The. Levers. Of. Power. Again!

Are you listening yet?

Update: As detailed in the title, a grand total of 11 showed up to see the New Brain of the Republican Machine. And 5 bought his "book". According to John Aravosis.

"When the town is burning you don't check party labels. Everybody needs to grab a hose."

Waldport Mayor Herman Welch has left the Republican Party for the independents, incidentally making him the first (as far as the Independent Party of Oregon knows) independent public office-holder in Oregon.

See ya, wouldn't wanta be ya:

At the age of 74 and after 53 years, I have finally quit the Republican Party and have re-registered as an independent voter.

Most of us understand that the president's economic recovery program
is not perfect and perhaps has flaws. But we also understand that our
country is in the midst of a very serious crisis. The president
understands the gravity of the problem and is trying to do something
about it.

The Republicans in Congress (except for the three who put their
country first and set aside party ideology by voting for the stimulus
bill) have offered no constructive economic recovery ideas except to
continue tax cuts for the rich (if any are left) and offer only
worn-out ideology.

I still believe in having political parties that engage in vigorous
constructive dialogue on economic issues, but as President Obama said
recently, "When the town is burning you don't check party labels.
Everybody needs to grab a hose."

(the above from his Oregonian Letter To The Editor of the 22nd)

He's taking what I like to call The Chinuk Prescription: If you're sane enough to leave the Republican Party and can't stomach the idea of being a Democrat, at least register independent.

Moreover I'd add here that if you have senior-age Mayors of small conservative coastal towns deserting your party, you're not getting ahead. This guy supported you since the waning days of Ike.

Republicans never liked thier elders if they spoke sense anyway.

Welcome to reality, Mayor Welch.